Detention
by Lady of the Dark
Summary: A seiries of short stories. The Marauders, along with Malfoy and Snape,are having detention together. What will happen when you put that group together?A lot of laughs, wackiness and much more. Read to find out.
1. Truth or Dare

A/N: this is my first attempt in a humor fic so don't hate me if you hate it. 

This story is about James and his friends in detention with Malfoy and Snape and they play Truth or Dare.

~*~*~*~*~*~*

"I'm bored," said Sirius. "Let's do something.

"It was because of you that we have detention in the first place," yelled Snape.

"Well it was worth it," said Sirius. "Your hair looks so greasy I just had to dump water on it."

Snape didn't say anything but glared at him.

"Well Sirius if you're bored we could play a little game," suggested Lily. 

"What kind of a game?" asked Sirius.

"Truth or Dare,' said Lily. "It's a Muggle game. You asked them if they want Truth or Dare and they will pick one. If it is truth then you ask them a question and they will have to answer it truthfully and if they pick dare then they will have to do what ever you tell them."

"Sounds like fun," said James, "and I'll go first."

He looked around at everyone.

"Snape, Truth or Dare?" he asked.

"Dare."

"I dare you to run around the room like a chicken with nothing but your underwear on," said James.

"What! No way," cried Snape.

"You have to. That's the rules," said James.

"Err, fine," said Snape and then he started to take his clothes off. When he pulled his pants off everyone began to laugh at his boxers.

"I never knew you like pink bunnies Snape," laughed Sirius.

"Oh just shut up," said Snape. " And besides it takes a real man to wear them."

He put his arms in his armpit and begins to wave them around. He starts to run and clucked like a chicken. When he was through he ran back to them. He looked to where his robes were but they were gone but what was there was a pink bunny costume.

"What is this? Where are my robes?" asked Snape.

"Well since you wear pink bunnies on your boxers we decided that you should be one," said Sirius.

"It's that or wear nothing but your boxers," said James.

"Oh you're going to get it," mumbled Snape as he was putting on the costume.

"Okay Snape it's your turn to ask someone," said Lily.

"Black Truth or Dare," said Snape.

"Dare," said Sirius. "Bring it on."

"Black I dare you to dress like a girl until detention is over," said Snape.

The grin on Sirius' face disappeared and he just stared at Snape.

"You got to be joking right?" ask Sirius.

"Nope," said Snape with an evil smile. He got out his wand and he changed Sirius' pants to a skirt and his shirt to a blouse but he also did something that Sirius did not intended to have. 

"What are these!" yelled Sirius. "Oh my God I have boobs. Snape you slime ball get ride of these."

"Nope," said Snape still smiling.

"Oh Sirius now that you look like a girl let me put some make up on you," said Lily.

She grabbed some out of her bag.

"Okay that is enough," said Sirius as he was getting away from her. "Peter, Truth or Dare?"

"Truth."

"Who do you have a crush on?" he asked.

Peter began to blush.

"Come on Peter, we know you like someone," said Sirius.

"Alright I like Allison," said Peter.

"Longbottom's girl?" asked James.

Peter nodded.

"Pete you dog you," said Remus.

"Hey I'm the dog, he's the rat remember," said Sirius.

" Yeah I know," said Remus.

Peter started to look around to pick on who would be next. His eyes where fixed on Malfoy.

"Malfoy Truth or Dare?"

"I want Truth."

"What's the matter Malfoy, too chicken to do the Dare?" asked James and then he started to make sounds like a chicken.

Snape got irritated and hit James on the back of the head. James stopped and tackled Snape.

"I'm no chicken. I'll take that dumb Dare," said Malfoy.

"I dare you to speak in rhyme for thirty minutes," said Peter. He took out his wand and he put the charm on him.

"This is so unfair. I knew I shouldn't have done that dare," Malfoy quickly covered his mouth.

Snape and James stopped fighting, looked at Malfoy and began to laugh. Malfoy got mad and his face started to get red.

"Potter this is for you. Truth or Dare would you do?" said Malfoy.

"I'm a man. So give me that dare," said James.

"Since this is a dare I will be unfair. Go kiss a guy but it can not be I," said Malfoy.

James looked around and the only guy that was close to him was Snape. So he grabbed him and gave him a big one right on the lips.

"Ew yuck Potter," said Snape. "Now I have to brush my teeth."

"Like you ever," replied James. He then turns to Lily. "What do you want Lily?"

"Truth."

"When you dream do you dream of me?" asked James.

"No. I dream of Snape in a speedo," grinned Lily.

"What!" yelled James and Snape.

"Just joking. Of course I dream of you," said Lily and then she walked over to him and gave him a kiss. "Okay Remus Truth or Dare?"

"Truth."

"Is it still true that you sleep with a teddy bear?" asked Lily.

"How did you know that?" said Remus. " James, how dare you to tell her." He went over to him and punched him in the arm.

"I'm sorry but she dragged it out of me." said James.

"Err and for that you're doing my truth," said Remus.

"But I didn't get to pick one," said James.

"You're doing my Truth," said Remus. "Are you afraid of the dark?"

"No," said James.

Just then the lights went off.

"AAAAHHHHH! Mummy," cried James.

The lights went back on and everyone saw James having a hold on to Snape.

"Get off of me Potter," said Snape. "It was bad enough that you kissed me."

James let go of Snape and brushed the wrinkles off from his robes.

"Peter, Truth or Dare?" asked James.

"Dare."

"Go put on a loincloth and swing on the vines like Tarzan," said James.

"James, what vines?" asked Peter.

"Those," said James pointing up after he cast the spell. He gave Peter the loincloth and he stuck it on.

"It's kindda breezy down there," said Peter.

"It's suppose to be," said James.

"Oh, I like it," said Peter.

He went over to a vine and began to swing. He swung to the next vine and as he was swinging he did the Tarzan call. When he was done swinging he want back to his friends.

"So how was I?" he asked.

"Great," said James.

"Fantastic," said Lily.

"Terrible," said Snape.

"Uh you guys where are my robes?" asked Peter.

"Well since you like that loincloth, I took your clothes so you could wear nothing but that," said Sirius.

"What! I'm gonna kill you," said Peter.

Then he began to chase Sirius around the room.

"I'll go since Peter is too busy trying to kill Sirius," said Lily. "Malfoy, Truth or Dare?"

"Truth."

"Why are your thumbs all weird. They have some kind of a scar," said Lily.

"As a child I would suck my thumbs. Sometimes I would suck so hard that they would go numb," said Malfoy. "Remus, Truth or Dare, if you care."

"Dare."

"I want you to dance. Put on a pink tutu and prance. Stay like that until the end, then you can change in your little den," said Malfoy.

Music came on and Remus' robes were gone and all he was wearing was a pink tutu. He started to dance. First he did the robot and then he moved it to the sprinkler. And for his finale he mooned walk.

"AH that was fun. Okay Lily Truth or Dare?" asked Remus.

"Dare."

"I dare you to go on all four and act like a dog," said Remus.

So Lily went to the ground and began to bark and scratch her ears. They were having so much fun until they heard Professor McGonagall.

"Excuse me." 

Peter stopped chasing Sirius, Lily got off of the ground and sat in a char and Remus and Snape tried to hide behind of James.

"Your detention is over but since you enjoyed it so much you'll spend another detention for me tomorrow," said Professor McGonagall.

"Oh great," said Snape and they left the room.

~*~*~*~*~*

A/N: so how was that? If you liked it you can help me with some ideas on what they will do in their next detention and if you hated it oh well but please review 


	2. Drunken Truth

Disclaimer: all the main characters don't belong to me, I own nothing

A/N: Thank you forbiddenlove, MPPSexxySiriusJamesRemus, Dues Ex, blue_tiger, SnufflestheInsane 

and Naurgaearon for giving me ideas for my story. I hope that y'all like this one.

Detention: Drunken Truth

"Yuck, this flobberworm is so disgusting," said Snape. "Is this the last item that we need to get?"

"No. We just need to wait for Lily and Sirius to come back from getting the wiggentree bark," said James.

Just then they heard some screams.

"What was that?" asked Malfoy.

"Sounded like Lily and Sirius," said James. "Come on let's find them."

But before they could move another inch Lily and Sirius came running by.

"Run for the hills," said Sirius. "Wait, there aren't any, who cares run for it!"

"Why? Is it bad?" asked Peter.

They turned around and saw a group of what seemed to be giant spiders.

"Yeah its bad," said Snape, and they started to run.

~* 30 minutes later *~

"Did we lose them?" said Malfoy taking in deep breaths.

"I think so," said Lily.

They all sat down and began to rest.

"Come on, we should get up and head back to the school," said James.

"Potter, which way is the school?" asked Snape looking around.

"Uhhh . . . "

"Oh great, we're lost," said Snape.

"We'll just spend the night here and tomorrow we'll head back," said James. 

"Oh no, I'm not spending the night here when there are man eating spiders out there," said Snape.

"Shut up Snape. Okay Peter, Remus can you find us some fire wood, Malfoy and Snape could you . . ."

"Hey who died and made you king of the world?" asked Malfoy. "Why should you give the orders?"

"Because I am so good looking and I have great leadership skills and . . . and why shouldn't I," smiled James.

"Oh please," Malfoy said while he rolled his eyes.

"Hey you guys, look what we found," said Remus, he was holding some glass bottles.

"Liquor, whiskey, tequila, vodka," said Sirius. 

"Here give me a bottle. If I'm going to spend the whole night here I'd rather be drunk," said Snape. He grabbed the whiskey. "AH, the good stuff."

~* An Hour Later *~

(They all sang)

"Hey ho to the bottom of my hoe, to heal my heart and drown my woe. The rain my fall the wind my blow, but there shall be . . . many miles to go. Sweet is the sound of the pouring rain and the stream that falls from the hill to plain. Better than rain or rippling brook . . ."

"And a bottle of whiskey inside that Snape," sang Sirius.

Everyone laughed, even Snape when he finished the last drop of whiskey.

"That's a good song. Where did it come from?" asked James.

"Some story about a ring," answered Sirius.

They all sat down by the fire.

"Man I'm a little light head. What about you," said Snape.

"Just an itsy bit," answered James. "Snape I just have to ask you. Why is it your hair is so damn greasy?"

"Call me Sevy and it's because of the gel that I use. Ode De Werewolf, made from real werewolf spit," said Snape

"Oh cool, can I spit in your hair?" asked Remus in delight.

"Why *hick-up*? Are you a wolfy?" asked Snape.

Remus nodded his head.

"Sure, why not *hick-up* I've been needed to gel my hair up again," said Snape.

"Wow, look at all the pretty horse," said Lily.

"I don't see them Lil," said Sirius.

"They're right in front of you dancing and flying," said Lily. "Boy I wish I *hick-up* could fly. Maybe I can." And she goes over to a tree and starts to climb it.

"Look at me I can fly." She'd jump and fell to the ground.

"Look at you, you're a freak," said James.

"Okay Sevy, your hair is done," said Remus giving one lasts lugy to Snape.

"Ah thanks. Oh, I think a song is coming to me," said Snape. "I'm too sexy for my shirt, too sexy for my shirt, so sexy it hurt." He took off his shirt and threw it into the fire and started to dance around. "I'm a model, you know what I mean? And I do my little turn on the catwalk. On the catwalk, on the catwalk yeah. I shake my little tush on the catwalk."

Lily got up and looked and Snape.

"Shake Sevy, shake what your mama gave you," said Lily and she went over to him and pinched his butt."

"Owe, I'm too sexy for my pants, too sexy for my pants, too sexy oh yeah." And then he started to unbutton his pants. Once they were off he tossed them into the fire as well. "I'm too sexy for my boxers, too sexy for my boxers . . ." he starts to take off he boxers.

"NO!"

"Oh man. You guys don't know how to have fun," said Lily and then she put her camera away.

"So James, how did you, a sly, troublesome guy ended up with sweet Lily?" asked Remus.

"I was failing Charms one year and McGonagall didn't want to kick me off the Quidditch team so she told Lily to tutor me to keep my grades up," said James.

"So did you like her then?"

"No way, she was too serious about school and did not have a social life. But when I came home that year my parents told me that I was promise to be married to an ugly French witch. So I told them about Lily and that she was my girlfriend and they called it off. So when school started I asked her out," said James

"Do you like her now?"

"Let's just say more than before."

She got up and walked over towards them. 

"So you really don't love me? Well that's a relief I don't like you at all. I just went out with you so I could be popular and to get laid," said Lily. "And man you're so annoying like when ever you takes your shoes off you have to make sure that each and every toe is clean of lent. You should see Remmy, I'm sitting in the Common Room and he would say stuff like: Ooooh I think I see more lent by my big toe. I better go and dig it out"

"That is so ridiculous. Reminds me when James and I put slime bullfrogs in Malfoy's pants," laughed Sirius. "How long did it take you to get rid of the slime?"

"You know if I could stand up and walk, I would walk over to you and pound you and James into the ground," said Malfoy glaring at him.

"Ah, come on, let's all stop. Fighting is bad," said Snape. "Why don't we all hold hands and sing a nice song."

"I think that the whiskey went to his head," said James.

"Come on, is anyone going to hold my hand and sing?" asked Snape.

"I will," said Peter.

They took each other hands and began to sing, "It's a small world after all. It's a small world after all . . ."

"Now I know they're mental," said James.

"It's a small world after all, it's a small world after all, it's a small world after all, it's a small, small world," they sang

"You want to know something?" asked Malfoy and then he took a swig of vodka. "I got a tattoo over the summer holiday. Do y'all want to see it?"

"Yeah sure."

"Why not."

Malfoy rolled his sleeves up and on his right arm below the wrist they saw a skull with a serpent.

"Oh cool," said James.

"Hey look, I got one too," said Snape.

"Me too," said Peter. And he turned around and took off his pants.

"Nice heart Pete but who's Fluffy?" asked Sirius.

"Oops, wrong one." He pulled his pants up and rolled up his sleeves. "Here it is." 

"Wow."

"I want one," said Sirius and James.

"Where did you get it done at?" asked Remus.

"From a guy . . . I think he was called the Dark Lord," said Malfoy. "This means that you're part of his club . . . I think."

"How do you join?"

"Don't know."

They then sat down by the fire once more.

"Some night this became," said Remus. "Does anyone think we will remember this?"

"Not one damn thing," said James. "You know what would bring the end to this night if some one would streak by us."

A couple of minutes later Snape got up took his boxers off and ran around them.

"Whoa, pretty fly for a white guy," said Lily.

When he stopped he grabbed his boxers and tossed them into the fire. Then Snape began to dance around and sing.

" And I do my little turn on the catwalk. On the catwalk, on the catwalk yeah. I shake my little tush on the catwalk."

"Okay Sevy, that is enough," said James and he grabbed his wand and did a spell to give him some clothes. But with his mind all cloudy, he instead gave him a barrel to cover up.

But after James gave Snape his barrel they all past out.

"Thank god they're alright," said Professor McGonagall. "What should we do with them now Albus?"

"Well first we would need to make sure that they won't remember what went on here, and in the morning we will come and get them," said Professor Dumbledore and then he did a Memory charm. "Come now Hagrid."

"Oh man, they drank all of my whiskey," said Hagrid and they left.

~* In the morning *~

"Ugh, my head, it hurts," complained Snape.

"Mine too," said Sirius. "What happened?"

"All I remembered is that we were being chased by giant spiders," said James. "And then Remus and Peter found something . . . and it's all a blank after that."

"Good morning students," said Professor McGonagall.

"Good Morning Professor McGonagall."

"How did you know where to find us?" asked Lily.

"When you didn't return last night Professor Dumbledore and I went looking for you. Then Hagrid reported smoke by his house and when we came to investigate we found you," said Professor McGonagall. 

"We're by Hagrid's hut?" asked Malfoy.

"Yes."

"Oh man," said Snape. "I could have gone back instead of staying here with these crazy nuts."

"Eh who are you call a crazy nut?" said James.

"Come now so you can get ready for school," said Professor McGonagall

They got up and began to follow her. But Snape stopped and looked at himself.

"Hey, why am I in a barrel? Where are my robes?" asked Snape. "Potter you did this didn't you?"

And he chased him all the way back to school.


	3. Karaoke with Style

**Disclaimer: the songs are from: Village People (YMCA and Macho Man), Gloria Gaynor (I Will Survive), Men in Tights from the movie Robin Hood: Men in Tights, Jane Taylor(Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star), It's a Small World After Allfrom a ride at Disney Land, MC Hammer ( I'm Too Sexy )and The Lion King, (Movie) The hula song **

**Karaoke with Style**

The Marauders plus Lily all walked down to Professor McGonagall's office. When they got there they saw Snape and Malfoy.

"Finally," said Snape. "I didn't want to wait any longer."

Professor McGonagall walked in. "Follow me and I will show you what you will be doing."

They followed her down the hall and into an old dusty room.

"For today's detention your job is to clean this room from top to bottom, the Muggle way."

Everyone looked around and there was an inch or two layer of dust on everything.

"In the past we had a Drama department and this was where we use to keep everything and perform in. I want you all to beat the dust out of the costumes and then put them all in one chest and if there's any stage props on the shelves put them in a separate chest."

She handed them all rags, dust pans, and brooms.

"I'll come back in two hours to check on you." She walked out and closed the door.

"I can't believe it," shouted Lucius. "This is servant's work and I'm not doing it." And he tosses his stuff to the ground.

"Oh yes you are," said James and he hits him with his broom.

Lucius tighten his hand to a fist and started to hit James but Sirius came and stopped him.

"The faster we get this done, the faster we can get out of here," he said.

Lucius put down his arm and went to get his stuff.

Hour and a half later-

The floor had been swept; the costumes were dust free and folded neatly in on chest. The windows were polished and so were the bookshelves and all of the props were put away. They were practically finished they just need Professor McGonagall to come and relieve them.

"Where is she?" asked Snape. "I want to leave."

"She said that she would be back in two hours. She has thirty more minutes," said Lily. "Why don't we do something to entertain ourselves?"

"Yeah but what?" asked Remus.

"Hey you guys we forgot to put away something," shouted Peter. He was behind the stage.

They all went back there to fine Peter trying to lift something.

"What is it?" asked James.

"I don't know," answered Peter.

Lily moved Peter to the side and whipped some of the dust off. She saw a button that said play and another one that said stop. She then took a rage and whipped the whole thing off.

"Wow, I've never seen one like this before," she said.

"What is it?"

"It's a karaoke machine but this is nothing like the one that the muggles use."

"How so?"

"It runs on magic instead to electricity. Come on let's take this out front," said Lily.

Snape and Lucius picked it up and Lily followed.

"Hey there's more clothes back here," said Sirius.

"But they are cool," said James. He grabbed a police costume and he got an idea. "Lily." He ran on the stage. "Let's do some karaoke. It will pass the time more quickly."

"Uh, okay. But I'm not sure how to work this."

"We'll just put the songs in by magic, duh," said James. "Just need someone to push the play and stop button. And me, Sirius and the gang will be first."

He got out his wand cast a spell and the machine came to life. James went back stage to get ready. Minutes later they all came on the stage in costumes. Sirius was dressed like an Indian, Peter was a construction worker, Remus was a biker and James police officer.

"Okay Malfoy, push play," said James. The music starts to play and they all grabbed their microphones.

_"Young man." _

"There's no need to feel down," sang James.

_"I said, young man." _

"Pick yourself off the ground," sang Remus.

_"I said, young man." _

"'Cause you're in a new town," sang Sirius.

_"There's no need . . . to . . . be . . . unhappy.  
Young man." _

"There's a place you can go," Peter sang

_"I said, young man." _

"When you're short on your dough," James sang

_"You can stay there" _

"And I'm sure you will find," sang Remus

_"Many ways to . . . have . . . a . . . good . . . time." _

"Come on everyone," yelled Sirius

_"It's fun to stay at the y-m-c-a." _

"Louder," cried James

_"It's fun to stay at the y-m-c-a.  
They have everything for young men to enjoy." _

"Oh yeah," said Sirius.

_"You can hang out with all the big boys . . ." _

"Let's hear it everyone," shouted Remus

_"It's fun to stay at the y-m-c-a.  
It's fun to stay at the y-m-c-a." _

The tempo changes and they all took off their shirts and put on some sunglasses.

_"Hey! Hey! Hey, hey, hey!  
Macho, macho man." _

"Macho man!" sang Peter

_"I've got to be, a macho man,  
Macho, macho man,  
I've got to be a macho man." _

"Dig the hair on my chest," Remus said than patted his chest

_"Macho, macho man,  
I've got to be, a macho man.  
Macho, macho man,  
I've got to be a macho man." _

"Dig broad shoulders sang," said Sirius.

_"Macho, macho man." _

"Dig my muscles!" James said and he starts to flex his arms.

_"I've got to be, a macho man.  
Macho, macho man,  
I've got to be a macho! HEY!" _

They finished and the crowed went wild (well only Lily). They took their bows and got off of the stage. Lucius got on and grabbed one of the microphones.

"Now I would like to introduce the lovely Miss Lily Evens."

Lily walked on in a dark shimmering blue dress. She grabbed the mic from Lucius and he went over to the machine and waited for her to say play.

"Okay Malfoy push it."

The music starts to play and she put the mic to her lips and sings.

_"At first I was afraid,  
I was petrified,  
Kept thinking I could never live without you by my side,  
But then I spent so many nights just thinking how you did me wrong  
And I grew strong  
And I learned how to get along  
And now you're back  
From outer space,  
I just walked in to find you here  
With that sad look upon you're face,  
I should have changed that stupid lock,  
I should have made leave your key,  
If I'd known for just one second  
You'd be back to bother me. _

Go on now go,  
Walk out the door,  
Just turn around now,  
Cause you're not welcome anymore,  
Weren't you the one who tried to hurt me with goodbyes  
Do you think I'd crumble?  
Do you think I'd lay down and die?  
Oh no not I

I will survive  
Oh as long as I know how to love  
I know I'll stay alive  
I've got all my life to live  
I've got all my love to give  
And I will survive  
I will survive  
Hey, Hey!"

"That's my girl," shouted James.

Everyone shouted as Lily took her bow and got off of the stage and sat next to them in an empty chair.

"Who's up next?" asked Remus.

"Severus Snape," answered Lucius. "And he will be singing "I'm too Sexy."

Snape walks on to the stage with black boots, very tight black leather pants, and a white shirt that's only button half way. He faces the audience and then turned around. He puts hair gel into his hair and slicks it back and then put on some black shades to finish it off. He turns back around and signals Lucius to start the music.

_"I'm too sexy for my love  
Too sexy for my love  
Love's going to leave me _

I'm too sexy for my shirt  
Too sexy for my shirt  
So sexy it hurts

He unbutton the rest, took the shirt off and then dropped it to the ground

_And I'm too sexy for your body  
Too sexy for you body  
The way I'm disco dancing. _

I'm a model, you know what I mean  
And I do my little turn on the catwalk  
On the catwalk, on the catwalk, yeah  
And I do my little turn on the catwalk

I'm too sexy for my car  
Too sexy for my car  
Too sexy by far

And I'm too sexy for my hat  
Too sexy for my hat  
Whatcha think about that?

And I'm a model, you know what I mean  
And I do my little turn on the catwalk  
Yeah, on the catwalk, on the catwalk, yeah  
And I shake my little tush on the catwalk."  
(repeats it one more time)

"My, he is sexy," said Lily.

James looked at Lily.

"Just kidding."

"Next," said Sirius.

"I'll be next," said Lucius. He walks on stage and grabbed Snape.

Lily went over to the machine and everyone waited for them to come out. Minutes later Lucius come out with a shark tooth necklace and a grass skirt.

"Come on Sev," Lucius said but Snape didn't want to move so Lucius grabbed him and pulled him out. Snape was dressed as a big pig. "Okay, I'm ready."

Lily pushed play and the music began.

_"Loua!  
If you're hungry for a hunk of fat and juicy meat,  
Eat my buddy Snape here because he is a treat,  
Come on down a dine,  
On this tasty swine,  
All you have to do is get in line.  
Are you aching?" _

"Yup . . . yup . . . yup . . ." said Snape.

_"For some bacon." _

"Yup . . . yup . . . yup . . ." said Snape.

_"He's a big pig," _

"Yup . . . yup," said Snape.

_"You can be a big pig too  
OY!" _

Everyone clapped their hands and they got off and Peter went on.

_"It's a world of laughter  
a world of tears.  
It's a world of hopes  
and a world of fears . . ." _

"Uh this is terrible," said Sirius.

A big cane came out of no where and took Peter off of the stage.

"That was the worst song I've ever heard," said Snape.

James looked at all of the guys.

"Boys, let's show Pete how to do it right."

All of the guys got up and followed James. They got changed into their costumes and went on stage. They were all dressed as Robin Hood and they were wearing green tights. James pointed to Lily and the music starts.

_"We're men, we're men in tights.  
We roam around the forest looking for fights.  
We're men, we're men in tights." _

"Tights," squeaked Snape.

_"We rob from the rich and give to the poor, that's right. _

"That's right," said Sirius

_"We may look like sissies." _

"I'm not but you might be," said Lucius to James

_"But watch what you say, or else we'll put out your lights." _

James gave Lucius a good punch in the nose.

_"We're men, we're men in tights." _

"Tight tights," groan Snape.

_"Always on guard defending the people's rights." _

"That is right," said Sirius.

_La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la. _

"We're men, manly men; we're men in tights Yeah!  
We roam around the forest looking for fights.  
We're men, we're men in tights."

"Really tight tights," whine Snape.

_"We rob from the rich and give to the poor, that's right." _

"That's right," said Sirius.

_"We may look like pansies." _

"I don't look like a pansy," said Lucius. He then duck James' punch but Remus kick him in the butt

_"But don't get us wrong, or else we'll put out your lights.  
We're men; we're men in tights, tight tights.  
Always on guard defending the people's rights.  
When you're in a fix, call for the men in tights. Hey" _

"Bravo," said Lily as she was clapping.

"That was indeed splendid," said a voice.

They looked towards the door and they saw Professor Dumbledore and Professor McGonagall.

"Professors we were . . ."

"Sorry that I was late relieving you from your detention. You can all leave now," said Professor McGonagall.

The guys got off of the stage.

"These tights are really tight," said Snape. "I don't think I'll be able to have any children."

They start to leave but then they heard someone on the stage. It was Peter dressed as a big star.

_"Twinkle, twinkle, little star,  
How I wonder what you are.  
Up above the world . . . _hey where are you going? I'm not done," said Peter.

"Come on Pete, let's go back to our common room," said Remus.

Peter took the star costume off, got off stage and left with them.


End file.
